Sunday, January 16, 2011

The Great Raccoon Incident and/or Debacle

Poor little guy, just wanted to get away from us.
So, a few years, back, let's say mid-May 2008, we had what we call 'The Great Raccoon Incident'.

There was a night time tangling, and the next day, I sent this email out to my neighborhood listserv:
Hello All,
We were foolish enough to leave our door open last night (a mistake that we feel pretty schooled on right now), and we had a nocturnal visitor.  Sadly, our dog noticed first, and tangled with said beastie.

I do not recommend separating dog/raccoon pairing while naked and sleepy.

The raccoon cornered itself under some furniture, and after some wishy/washyness, I called 911 b/c I have to admit, I have NO IDEA if angry, hurt beast is considered an emergency.  Big shout out to Stephanie at 911, who had the most soothing voice ever, and got animal control for us.  And Chris from animal control, who despite getting roused from bed was cheerful about the whole thing.

Unfortunately, by the time Chris arrived, the raccoon ran out the back.  I say unfortunately because even thought I was pretty happy to have it out of the house, it was clearly injured from the fight.  And since they don't have the raccoon, we're taking our dog in for a rabies booster.

Anyway, long story even longer: If you see an injured raccoon in the neighborhood, please call animal control.  If it's injuries were worse than we realized, and you find it's body, please call animal control rather than disposing of it yourself, as I'd like to have it tested for rabies.

Oh, and if you are silly like us: close your doors and doggie doors at night!

{our address} 

Blue with a party hat, getting a rabies booster.
A friend kindly pointed out that I had told everyone:
  1. We sleep naked
  2. We didn't just have our back door unlocked, but wide open
  3. Our address
Like this, only silver
and way less intimidating.
Of course, not included in the story was the fact that S. was doped up on Nyquil and basically useless, that when the ungodly yowling of Blue and the raccoon 'rasslin woke us up, my first instinct to protect us was to shriek and then grab something.  That 'something' ended up being a small djembe drum.  Have you ever tried to wield one as a weapon?  Not recommended.

In fact, we stood there, me with drum in hand, S. mostly just bearing extreme befuddlement, and watched the two animals knock into the kitchen door and it slowly slam shut.  Blocking the egress.  S.  did manage to get a hold of Blue and pull her off the raccoon.  But it was a total stand off.  S. holding a very riled up dog, me with my drum, the raccoon with a serious case of crazy eyes and no way out.

The raccoon dashed away from the kitchen, and under some furniture in the dining room.  I had no idea the horrifying noises that raccoons make.   We threw open the kitchen door, and created a blocking tunnel of  boxes to try and convince the raccoon to flee.  Which, of course, it only did about 5 mins before animal control showed up.

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  1. i do enjoy a good raccoon story & one with nudity included is kind of like a bonus for funny points! we have lots of raccoons who visit our deck at night (some of us close our doors at night... jus saying. =) ) and i went thru a thing last spring where i felt the need to film & photograph them every night. a wee obsession may have developed.

  2. I'm sorry I just had to laugh at you trying to use a drum as a weapon. On the upside, Blue defended your home against a masked invader. I hope Blue is OK.

  3. Why do we all grab the weirdest things when faced with an animal intruder?

    One time I threw drink coasters at a rat. Weirdest reaction ever.

  4. Sleeping naked seems rather natural to me. :-P Unless it is in the winter time. Then, that is just plain wrong.

    -Barb the French Bean

  5. Baaahahaha! Is all I have to say. LOL The whole story is hilarious! But I have to admit, I wouldn't want it to happen to me.

  6. ha ha ha!!!! What a fun story for this morning! I'm looking forward to the rest of your blog, too! =D

  7. oh my goodness, lol. i can't imagine witnessing this, i'd think i'd be sorta dumbstruck, too. and i can't get past the back door wide open thing...i'm like a maniac when it comes to making sure we're all locked in for the night.

  8. @Sherilin: It's definitely the kind of story where I'm like: do I share? Is it funny? If funny: yes! I do think raccoons are interesting creatures, but feel like I don't need such an 'up close' experience now.

    @Condo: Blue is totally fine! She didn't appear to have any broken skin, but we took her to the vet and got a rabies booster as a precaution. And I wielded that drum like a freaking CHAMP!

    @JUST ME: HAH! Ok, but if they were at hand, what else were you gonna throw at a rat? Wild animals in the home definitely seem to prompts the flight/fight/fling random shit response!

    @Barb: I'm still a naked sleeper, even in winter cause heated mattress pads TOTALLY ROCK!

    @Haley: I laugh about it now, but it actually was really scary at the time, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone else!

    Mindy: Nice ta meetcha! I'm looking forward to your blog :)

    @Cape: While I still sleep in the starkers, the door is now FIRMLY closed and locked. No more nocturnal visitors for us!


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